FIVE BELLS

The old rickety engine that drives the sale of most products and services and bad political ideas is FEAR.

Your body stinks.

Your body leaks.

Your breath, hair, arms, privates are all inadequate.

Get NEW ALL-PURPOSE FIX-O!

Buy this big honking truck, you dumb rube.

There you go. Now you're a REAL MAN!!!

So how surprised should we be that one of the most scurrilous politicians in America today is hollering FIRE in the opera house this morning over...what?

The Canada-US border.

Yes, Senator Joe Lieberman suggests that perhaps we Canadians should need a visa to enter the US.

Why?

Because we have lenient asylum laws and immigrations laws.

I have a rabbi friend who thinks the independent Senator from that heavily besieged state of Connecticut is great because the good Senator is an orthodox Jew who never lets his duties interfere with the sabbath.

With due respect to my rabbi friend, this is the kind of non-thinking ethnic voting that has become one of the hallmarks of voting in Canada.

Here's what we thank the various lords for -

Joe is not seeking re-election.