Driving Us Crazy

I was muttering in my car again the other day.

There's always something. On this occasion, a Vancouver Police Car turned onto the street I was travelling on. The driver gave no signal whatsoever. That's usual for Vancouver drivers. So usual that it became one of my standard silly gags on the radio. "Vancouver cars are not sold with turn signals, " I'd declare, and god knows how many believers went along for the ride.

But a cop?

"If we can't expect you to play by the rules, " I fumed pointlessly, "how can we expect anyone else to?"

Now, comes the story of a Prince George RCMP officer, who is a member of the drug squad. The fellow takes out a patrol car to go to a private party. INFRACTION #1. He drinks we don't know how many beers and gets back behind the wheel of his police car. INFRACTION #2. He smashes into a parked car. INFRACTION #3. He leaves the scene of the accident. INFRACTION #4.

About an hour later, he asks a fellow officer for advice. HE NEEDS ADVICE???

He said he "was unsure what to do."

He is both a police man and a drunk driver who has left the scene of an accident and he needs advice? If he doesn't know the rules, who does?

Net result?

This petty criminal, this dangerous, out-of-control, alcoholic fool is docked 9 days pay. He is not fired. He is not charged with anything.

He is still a member in good standing of the RCMP's drug squad.

The most dangerous drug in the world, the drug that causes the most harm viewed from any point of departure, is alcohol.

But a drunk drug cop who smashes into some else's car and leaves the scene of the "accident" is still trusted with the task of enforcing Canadian drug laws.

And we wonder why so many citizens despair of the possibility of finding justice in Canada.

To Come...

The drunk driving drug squad cop story will follow later today...

Stay tuned.

War, at Any Cost

One of the great consistencies of history is the sound of politicians justifying war.

There is always, apparently, a good reason for your sons to die "honorably."

And there is always the ploy of confusing the criticism of the campaign with an implied criticism of the soldiers in the front. This is not only a blatantly false equation, it is ugly and detestable.

When I hear of 6 more Canadian soldiers dying in a completely mistaken and hopeless mission in Af-bloody-ghanistan, I do not find myself overtaken by a communal sense of "genuine, shared grief."

Rather, I am outraged.

While Vimy Ridge is being rightly memorialized, this stupid commitment to failure in Afghanistan continues.

The flags of democracy and other highly held western ideals are waved about, to be sure. But this is the customary sham.

As much as America should get out of Iraq as soon as possible, Canada should get out of Afghanistan even sooner.

Canadian soldiers dying for the ultimate furtherance of a heroin-based economy is a maddening obscenity.

Better Late Than Never

This morning, The Rag suggest that PoCo Mayor, Scott Young, in jail over the weekend for yet another domestic problem, should step down until his legal dusts have settled.

Good.

We suggested that on Good Friday, April 6th.

Happy Holidays

Have a restful and thoughtful and loving holiday.

Grand Illusions

Here is the first paragraph from a story in this morning's New York Times:

WASHINGTON, April 7 — Three months after the United States successfully pressed the United Nations to impose strict sanctions on North Korea because of the country’s nuclear test, Bush administration officials allowed Ethiopia to complete a secret arms purchase from the North, in what appears to be a violation of the restrictions, according to senior American officials.

Now read the entire story here, and think about how little that is told or reported is even remotely close to the reality. When it comes to politics (and maybe Big Biz and Big Relig and Big Cancer and Big Social Services and anything else where the stakes are very very high), an enormous Pea and Shell game is at play.

Never forget what David Mamet, American playwright and pretty serious card player once said, "If you're sitting in a poker game, and after 10 minutes you're still wondering who the mark is, it's you!"

The News Down Under - Waaayyy Down Under

Two stories out of Australia are worth our attention...sort of.

The first shows that we are not alone here in Canada in our fine disregard for any common sense in the arena of Criminal Justice. The Aussie headline says it all, "Child murderer may be back out within a week." How reassuring that other jurisdictions are a mistaken as we are in dealing with lunatics.

The second story is about "moobs." I realize this may be a new word for most of us, but when you consider that we all learned to say "manssier," after a certain Seinfeld episode, I'm sure we can get used to men having their "breasts" surgically reduced in size. Yikes!

Getting it Wrong, and for the Wrong Reasons

The Number One story today and for the next umpteen years is and will be Climate Change.

This morning's Rag puts it at the bottom of the page.

Why? Because they think a completely false non-story about kids choking themselves is a better (racier, sexier, bloodier, more lucrative) headline.

Wrong again, Boys.

The professor's "one in five" bullshit ranks right up there with one-in-five Canadians is suffering from depression and one-in-ten persons is gay, both of which are colossol fictions furthered by people with a stake in the lie.

How about one in five academics is a dork who is hopelessly out of touch woith reality. Uh, make that three in five.

A Hard Rain's Gonna Fall

Unbelievable, but true.

Saw it with my own eyes.

Yesterday, I'm on my morning walk in the 'hood. The headlines are screaming global warming and the end of lives as we know them. Water, for sure, will be scarce.

So, I'm walking. And we've just survived - what - 40 days and 40 nights of relentless rain. So, we've got the first day of sunshine in months, and...you guessed it, some yahoo is sprinkling his little lawn and his two patches of daffodils.

It's no wonder we're destroying the earth. people are just flat stupid and dead selfish.

Bob Dylan - Masters of War

You asked for it; you got it.
Thanks so much for the recommendation.
Dylan was sitting next to me in a folk coffee shop on West Broadway in the 60's, while the owner was denying the rumor that Mr. Dylan might drop by.

Johnny Cash - Hurt

The last and possibly the greatest video by the master story teller.

Disney Opens Weddings to Gay Couples

Read it here.

What else can you say? Except, "Some day my Prince will come..."

Audio: First test - David Berner’s blog

I have finally found a piece of software that looks like it will do the trick for posting audio blog monologues. That's the good news.

The goofy news is I haven't quite figured out exactly how to use it. Keep in mind that I am a complete geek, with hands as soft as a baby's bottom.

So, patience, bloggists, patience.

Soon, I promise. We're closer...really...

Honor Among Thieves

Two local stories collide.

Basi, Virk and others are finally going to court after a police raid on the Provincial legislature MORE THAN 3 YEARS AGO. Whatever happened to "Justice delayed is justice denied?"

We still don't really know what all of this is about, although drug smuggling and drug sales seem to be involved, as does the sale of BC Rail to Canadian National.

Many have already been charged with various crimes around this story, and, although one or two actually have served some jail time, there is a litany of stayed, stayed, conditional sentence and more conditional sentences.

Down the road a piece, Poco mayor, Scott Young, is in trouble with the law again. He seems to have an anger management problem when it comes to intimate relationships. When asked by The Sun their feelings about their mayor being arrested - again - Poco citizens were marvelously forgiving. They offered the Canadian shrug. "Look at Premier Campbell, drunk driving, I don't think that's such a major issue."

Whatever happened to falling on your sword. You've disgraced your public office, you apologize ans step down.

Not in this era. Not when I am always right and I can never do wrong, because I am me and this is my movie and we can always spin this story in my favor.

Not when trials take 3 or 4 years and cases can't be won.

lou rawls northseajazzfestival 1992

Check out this hot, hot cut of the master live at the NorthSea jazz festival. We saw Lou in the main room at the Fairmont in San Fransisco in the 70's. There was one black couple in the audience, which mostly looked and acted like a mural. Staring incomprehensively at this guy on stage. Nevertheless, he killed.
He is the man who revolutionized the singing of the American national Anthem. It happened at a 49ers football game and he blew everyone's mind by turning the song into a very black and blue blues.
He aslo raised millions of dollars for the United Negro College Fund.
A great Citizen and such a rich singer.

Your Art, My Art

The Vancouver Art Gallery has lizards and other strange small creatures on display today. It is part of a new "installation."

I have some advice for you, Art Lovers. As soon as you hear the word, "installation," get on your palimino and head off in the opposite direction as fast as those 4 legs'll carry you.

Installations and video works are among the greatest hoaxes of the modern art world.

I remember vividly wandering through the wondrous halls of the San Fransisco Museum of Modern Art a few years ago. Much on display was wonderful. Then I entered a very large room where a crowd of people were encircling something.

I muscled my way into the inner layers of the crowd and this is what I found.

Hundreds of stuffed toy poodle dogs, black and standing about knee high, were arranged in dozens of concentric circles, all focused on a $5 toy baby doll lying on its back in the centre of the circle.

The people were silent. They were giving serious consideration to this drek.

I started to laugh. Then I howled. Then I said something real friendly, like, "You folks are idiots," and I moved on to the next room.

What the art galleries of the world need these days is more living creatures. Not lizards and spiders, but curators and administrators who can tell the difference between exciting new art and lazy, conceptual put-ons.

When it comes to Art, with a very big A, the emperor has no clothes.

O'Reilley Hates Immigrants

Like all scoundrels who hide behind the flags of patriotism, Fox News cretin, Bill O'Reilly, got into the most unattractive shouting match with Geraldo the other night. Aside from ignoring at his own peril Marshall McLuhan's famous dictum that "Radio is hot, TV is cool," O'Reilly wonderfully revealed what a tiny hate-monger and threatened dweeb he truly is.

Check it out in full color here.

And while you're at it, click on the story on the same link page about McCain's "Jew Counter." I tell you, America is just one big Love Fest.

Rollover, Beethoven

All new cars will have systems installed by 2012 that will prevent rollovers, which result in thousands of deaths each year.

Many SUV's already have this inexpensive technology on board.

That's the good news.

The bad news comes from these 2 questions:

1. If the technology has been around for a while and it costs under $150 per unit, why hasn't it been installed years ago, and why wait until 2012? Put the sucker in tomorrow.

2. Does this just mean that SUV fools will feel emboldened to drive even faster in the ice and snow on the Whistler highway, now that they believe they can't possibly tip ooooooooooover?

Best New Business Name This Year

A friend of a friend with some internal problem is attending - and we are not kidding, we are not inventing this - the following office:

UPPER CANADA LOWER BOWEL CLINIC

Anita Baker,

Here's one of the true originals. She has completely her own marvelous sound. One of the great, great jazz singers.