LEGALLY BLOND

Vancouver City Councillor, Kim Capri, who like most of her colleagues, voted against giving the police more manpower (Can we say such a thing these days without the Policewomen's League putting us in handcuffs?), has now taken to doing "ride-abouts" with the cops. And lo! She has found - wait for it - that people who fall out of bars late at night sometimes PEE AND FIGHT IN THE STREET!!!

Never saw a western movie.

Never stayed for an extra barley sandwich after closing.

Never, apparently, left her front lawn before now.

And, gosh, now that she's seen the yellow light, something's just got to be done, to be done, to be done, done, done.

How do these folks get elected? And what happens to them the day after they are elected?

Meanwhile...in the capital city of Oz...

Auditor-general, Arn van Iersel, is afraid to go to his office because there are addicts and homeless people shooting up and fornicating right there in public in Bastion Square.

Doesn't Arn see the march of Human Progress here? Usually, addicts are too stoned to screw.

Well here are the solutions for Kimmie Bear and Arn.

For Kim, just keep giving the bars all the possible leeway you can to pour all the bad hooch at all the idiots they can for as late into the wee hours as you and your council will allow.

And for Arn, just import Vancouver's progressive mentality and give the poor addicts some free and better quality stuff every morning so they'll go back to being too stoned to do the other thing.

You see how easy this all is when we can all agree on "an integrated approach?