Guest Blogger Victor on the City That Won't be Quiet
I always admired the way Johnny Carson retired.
He entertained us for 30 years, said "Thank you; it's been a pleasure," and stepped away from the lights.
A lesson clearly missed by Mike Harcourt, Jerry Lewis, Rafe Mair and others.
Guest blogger, Victor, rants on the City that won't shut up. This is followed, irony upon irony, by an invite I was sent moments later:
VICTOR:
Globe and Mail columnist Ian Brown once wrote a spoof booklet called " A Wanker's Guide to Canada". It was for those Canadians who needed something, anything to brag about in order to shore up their inferiority.
We need a special edition for Vancouver. This city takes civic wanking to ludicrous lows.
The latest example is Harcourt's book, " City Planning in Paradise". Why do we feel the need to use these sophomoric superlatives in referring to our city?
We used to loathe Toronto for being self-absorbed but Vancouver has become an urban tampon.
Every award given to Vancouver, no matter how obscure the source (Madrid Welders Association Rates Vancouver the Top Vacation Spot) gets front page treatment. Like the chronically insecure teenager, Vancouver covets and trumpets the most tenuous praise and if none is forthcoming, it praises itself.
But in fairness, wanking has become a provincial pattern. How else can we explain that modest license plate that proclaims that BC is "The Best Place on Earth"? Even the most boastful Texan stopped short of such graceless egotism. I guess we can expect that during the Olympics , we'll have a banner at the airport saying " Welcome all of you travelers from inferior countries".
THE INVITE:
Event Info
Name:
The Paradise Makers
Tagline:
Interviews with the leaders and decision-makers who shaped the city and region we know today
Host:
Gordon Price
Type:
Education - Lecture
Time and Place
Date:
Friday, September 7, 2007
Time:
7:00pm - 8:40pm
Location:
SFU Harbour Centre
Street:
515 West Hastings Street, Segal Centre
City/Town:
Vancouver, BC
Can you believe I will miss this?
3 comments:
Spot on as usual Victor.
For the love of God, Mr. Berner, could you please comment on Mayor Sam Sullivan's interview this afternoon on BNN (Available on bnn.ca).
It was brilliant (snicker) how he glossed over the tough questions with the standard vanilla answers: 'gold medal city' for quality of life (according to some British study), Ecodensity, our wonderful (as yet uncleared in Stanley Park) seawalls, and crying poverty on account of lack of provincial & federal funding (but yet he boasts of freezing business taxes).
I thought you'd get a kick out of our fine mayor's comments on the VPD's "Catch and Release" program - no blame on the courts' revolving door.
signed, a fed-up Vancouverite
You know what?
I can't comment on that broadcast, because it would mean I would have to actually listen to the nutty mayor and I can't stand the sound of his fake, whiny I'm-just-a-charming-little-boy bullshit.
I'd rather lsietn to Alice Cooper singing highlights from The King and I.
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