Sunday, March 8, 2009

COOPED UP - Pooped Out


It is now legal to keep chickens in your back yard in the City of Vancouver.

This is what your City Council is up to these days.

And they did it all without Kim Capri.

Can you say, "RATS!' boys and girls?

Vermin, stink, guano, foxes, coyotes, raccoons...

Sometimes you read things or hear abut them in the grocery store and you think, "No, that can't be. Who would do something that idiotic?"

So you dismiss the whole idea for a day or two and finally you go back and do the research, and, yes, they really did it.

Vancouver city council voted unanimously Thursday to change city bylaws to legalize the keeping of urban hens.

I will never run for office.

But if I was in council on the day such a nincompoop notion was raised I would squawk, "SHUT UP! GET OUT! We have serious business to do here."

This a city.

Or an approximation of one. A facsimile. We try to be a city.

In real cities, people don't even have lawns. They have parks and commons.

Chickens are for farms.

I buy my already slaughtered chicken at Safeway. After I do some things to it over a fire we like to call a stove, it's just fine thank you. Yummy.

My grandmother, who was born in Russia, bought live chickens from a farmer and killed them and prepared them in our kitchen sink.

IT WAS DISGUSTING!

I was very glad to leave 1950 Winnipeg behind.

Why are we revisiting a disease-ridden, plague-driven, stinky messy gulag lifestyle?

What next? Lions? Alligators?

How about a piranha tank at 12th and Cambie?

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

And they say that Vancouver is no fun. Green acres is the place for me . Farm living is the life for me. Guess Ill give up my dream of a hobby farm in the valley and move to a farm in the West End.
This proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that we dont pay enough to get quality people involved in politics.
What a bunch of morrons.

David in North Burnaby BC said...

Hahahaha... Yeah, Mayor Happyplanet is going to be a lotta laffs. Hahahaha...
Now he's having the lawns at City hall dug up for growing veg. I wonder how they're planning to keep the raccoons out of it, make a helluva mess those rascals.
In the old days before we moved into town we hunted 'em down and shot 'em when they tore up a crop.
Maybe Mayor Action Man has a good coon hound.
I hear the "Green Acres" theme firing up. Hahahaha.....

David in North Burnaby BC said...

And I won't even let myself get started about chickens. Ahahahaha....

David in North Burnaby BC said...

I couldn't resist. This new mayor of yours is gold, Vancouver. Thank you so much. hahahahaha ....

http://davidinnorthburnablog.blogspot.com/2009/03/mayor-green-acres.html

Anonymous said...

There will be no room for a piranha tank at City Hall, because it will be surrounded by vegetable gardens and probably chicken coops, too.

Here we go again...backwards through time with our new hayseed City Council at the helm. While the world crumbles around us, we'll be too busy tending to our chickens and veggie gardens.

Anonymous said...

Funny...I thought I voted for Gregor Robertson, successful small businessman, etc...turns out I voted for Farmer Robertson!!!

Chickens in the city...the population of rats, racoons, skunks, etc is going to go through the roof. Bird flu, anyone???

And what's going to happen to all the "pet chickens" that parents will be sure to buy for their kiddies for Easter, when the kiddies don't want them any more - dump them in the park, so they can take up housekeeping with the abandoned rabbits? See comments above about exploding wildlife.

As for tearing up the lawn at City Hall for a veggie garden - a friend of mine in Texas wanted to know if pot counted as a vegetable! I had to chastise him as I nearly spewwed tea all over my computer screen...

Pearl in Vancouver