Wednesday, March 11, 2009

HOLIDAY PLANS


That's it.

I'm going to Melbourne when the world comes here.

Did you see the announcement this morning?

Major traffic routes in and out of and around the downtown core will be closed during the 17 day Gordon Campbell Games next year.

And much of the downtown will be one big pedestrian mall - or should that be, maul?

If this were some civilized city, and it's not, that might be a pleasant idea. People strolling, enjoying the sense of community.

But this is Canada, and the Wild West to boot, where The Romance of the Drunken Lout continues full force.

We are a crude adolescent culture. Break me another cold one, eh?

And no, I will not be renting my house out to some nutty coke-fueled NBC cameraman or executive.

I think I'll just quietly slip outta town and come back when the hay has been lifted.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Can I come?

David Berner said...

Of course.

Just bring money for the capuccino.

Anonymous said...

Hi David, if you do go, I hope you will let us poor saps in Vancouver follow your travels on-line, as was your trip to Ireland.
I understand that Melbourne has the world's largest tram system, and their Metlink system was privatized in 1999.
That is where Translink should go.

Anonymous said...

Let's all go ( I was going to say we'd all like to come with you but someone might misinterpret that). So, give Big Jimmy a call--see if his plane is available, and perhaps Peter Brown or whomever it was took Gordo to Beijing. (He should've left him there). It should be easy to round up 24 persons or so then apply to Tourism Canada for a grant as this will be MISSION POSSIBLE to publicize BC as opposed to the MISSIOBN IMPOSSIBLE HERE by the SHIP OF FOOLS a.k.a. VANOC.

Anonymous said...

Melbourne has the largest tram system in the Southern Hemisphere. The largest tram system to day, must be Karlshrue, Germany, with their tram-trains (streetcars that can operate on regular railways) has well over 450 km. of route mileage, with the longest run being 210 km.!

Malcolm J.

Anonymous said...

Stop in Auckland, NZ on your way to Melbourne. The people are friendly and the place is so clean.