Where are the Six-fingered schools?

Toronto is considering "Africentric" schools for black kids.

That's to go along with the gay school and First nations schools.

Where are the fat schools, the left-handed, tall Asian schools and the determined-to-be-a-seamstress schools?

I had lunch yesterday with a man from Ghana.

He is black.

He got a BA in Akra and an MA in Atlanta, Georgia.

He teaches people who to be successful entrepreneurs. The people he teaches are black, white, yellow, green and purple. They are slim and round and short and high and high.

Toronto, Board of Ed....give your head a shake.

Stop me...I'm talking again...

The BC government is considering banning cell phones form young drivers. Hm?

The most dangerous nut jobs I've encountered - make that, I encounter every day - are middle-aged "nice" people. Women shopping, men hustling...one arm steering their Exploders through Safeway lots of warp speed while jammering on their fones.

I talk occasionally on my cell while driving, and I always know that I am wrong, that I shouldn't and that I am a lesser driver when I do.

The truth is I'm not involved in saving the world's financial markets, so nothing I have to say is that important it couldn't wait until I get to home or to my office or to a parking space.

Rap Sheet - Our Weekly Crime Round-Up

1. Reyat will plead guilty of perjury.

O.K. And then? Will he be given an extra 5 or 10 years of prison for killing 331 people?

Will he reveal the truth about the other bombers? Is there anything this man can say that can be believed?

2. The career gangster was "a loving person." Of course. And so was Don Corleone and Tony Soprano. We are complex. Whitman said it best. "I am large. I contain multitudes." But was he really thinking of his neighbourhood bling-boasting, gun-toting drug lord at the time?

3. The unnamed teen who attacked Michael Levy with a hatchet - thus leaving the young victim to a life of misery - may have his case raise to adult court. Please. You're old enough to drive and kill for your country. You're old enough to do the time for the crime.

4. 99 ski resort operators in BC, Alberta and Ontario have agreed that they won't charge "out-of-bounders" for rescue costs. "We don't want anyone to feel they shouldn't call us because they can't afford a rescue."

This is precisely why they SHOULD charge these fools. Are you telling me that, dying of hypothermia in the snow and the dark, you're going to hesitate to call for help? I don't think so.

Obama asked if Bill Clinton was the first black president

Can Girls be Violent?

BIG BIG SHOCKING HEADLINE.

Girl cuffed etc. in police cell.

Perhaps at first hysterical glance this appears to be an obvious case of "police brutality."

Perhaps we weren't there.

Perhaps you have never been in the presence of a drunk and violent teenager.

William Glasser, the author of the ground-breaking work, "Reality Therapy," pointed out 40 years ago that the first thing you have to do with an out-of-control person is stop him.

Of course, today in a society soft of belly and brain matter, a society dedicated to the proposition that anything I do is OK, such notions as restraint seem quaint,

Why is this girl suing the police 3 years later?

Perhaps this was a really, really slow news day.

Duh?

80,000 Olympic plates sold.

???

The moment you get this impulse to waste $60, please call me and I'll give you a list of worthy charities.

Short story

A man drinks all night at a Victoria pub. The staff don't stop servng him, but they try to encourage him not to drive home. They warn him that they will call in his license number to the police. He drives, he crshes into a wall. He's dead.

The good part of this story is that he didn't kill anyone else.

$450/Hour? One born every minute

A rare kudo to the BC Law Society.

Usually protective to a fault, like all other so-called "professional" bodies, the Society is investigating massive over billing by Liberal Senator Mobina Jaffer and her son.

This raises among other questions why do we have a Senate? How does Jaffer qualify? What earnings are Senators allowed outside of their heavy, serious Red Chamber duties?

End the Free Rides

Guest Editorialist, John Martin, writes very well in the Province today what many of us have been hollaring for years. No more Statuatory Release for prisoners. You want parole? Earn it, the old fashioned way. Whatever that may be.

Read this first-rate piece here.

Heath Ledger Dead at 28

Please read this shocking news here.

Housing and History

If the nation's mayors are going to beseech Stephen Harper to fund remedies for homelessness, it would help if they knew their own history.

The federal government was in the social housing business in a major way for many, many years under the auspices of the Central Mortgage & Housing Corporation, CMHC.

About the same time that Ottawa abandoned funding for health care (from 50% to 18%), police and the military, funding for social housing was torn out of the CMHC mandate. For the past 30 years, this initiative has not been on the horizon.

Demand of the Prime Minister that CMHC be returned to its former role.

Watch Out for the BCTF - They are Testy

Of course the BCTF is against any kind of testing.

We have had this argument for years.

I work at a college. I see kids term after term studying for exams. Do they need an army of grief counsellors to cope?

Driving to the grocery store is a contest. It shouldn't be. It needn't be. But more often than not it is.

We are tested every day in a thousand little ways.

What do the well-armored folks at the BCTF want to do - keep kids in swaddling clothes until they are 16 and truly unable to face life?

Not really. They just want to protect their tiny domain.

Edwards, Who Cannot Win, Is Best

The headline says "Obama & Clinton Tangle at debate."

But that wasn't the story at all.

The real story was how articulate and focused and fascinating was 3rd place runner John Edwards, who easily outshone his opponents for the Democratic Presidential nomination.

At one great moment, during the increasingly tiresome cat fight between Hillary and Barak, Edwards interjected something like, "How is all this personal mudslinging going to get us better health care, education and housing?"

Hillary was sharp as always, if not lovable.

Obama was curiously mushing and deficient when it came down to details. He was obviously swinging on his own star. He seems to be magnificent when orating in grand terms, but less than assuring when it comes down to the nitty gritty of real issues. he seems to be a man who wants too much to be loved.

Edwards on the other hand was very impressive in every way. Solid, knowledgeable, passionate and reasonable.

It's too bad he hasn't a hope in hell. He might ,make a fine President.

But this is the day that the Oscars were announced.

In modern life, all is show biz.

Quotes of the Day

Hahahaha...these are classics:

1. Gangster is gunned down. Real Bonny & Clyde stuff. Guy is known drug kingpin associate of many underworld leaders.

Into the fray steps a writer who was teaching creative writing in a prison. Now, there's a worthy to begin with.

Writer says of recently deceased, "This is realy tragic. He was a very creative guy. It is really sad to me that the prison system failed him."

THE PRISON SYSTEM FAILED HIM...

Does this genius still have a gig?

Does "the prison system" have a clue? Does Mr. Novel Teacher?

2. Questioned about the 8 1/2 Million dollars tax payers shelled out for the Strike named after him ("Sam's Strike"), the Nutty Mayor squealed out this gem.

" The level of service was much higher than in previous strikes."

Hahahaha....

One can wait weeks for stuff like this.

Thank you, Gods of Public Postulence.

Alex Tsakumis on Vision in Friday's 24 Hours

A VISION OF HOPE
By A. G. Tsakumis ‘Rebel With a Clause’

One needn’t look any further than Vision Vancouver’s Annual General Meeting of last Monday for incontrovertible proof of the ruling Non-Partisan Association’s pending apocalypse. It was startling: 400 committed, enthusiastic members, in sync and empowered to bid Sam Sullivan’s nothingness a celebrated farewell, in attendance at an otherwise administrative meeting where the clearly united Board presented with purposeful clarity and conscience. Moreover, present without masquerade were over three dozen former NPA members, almost ten percent of the room, and a surprisingly healthy contingent of former COPE members. Interesting too, the number of prominent federal Liberals, whose natural constituency you’d think would be the NPA: Mike Witherly, campaign boss for B.C.; Catherine Evans, former candidate; Ian Bailey, provincial director; Senator Larry Campbell, of course, and none other than Greg Wilson, ubiquitous ground war campaign tactician to the Grit (non)stars, and, immediate past campaign manager of the NPA. Mr. Wilson was also elected to the newly expanded Board of Directors. This was no ordinary show of strength. So much for the necessity of a deal between Vision and the ultra-left blowhards at the rapidly (thankfully) disintegrating COPE. With this much momentum, skill and organization already in the tank, Vision will be almost impossible to beat for council. The notion that they are the farm team for the NDP is laughable. What does that make COPE? I’ll tell you. The witness protection program for dogmatic has-beens, who’d rather talk about Marx than Main Street. Think about their priorities for a rapidly devolving Vancouver: nuclear free zones, Dubya’s political donors and flute players at council meetings. While our city crumbled they fondled with their incessant need to pontificate about inconsequential matters that served absolutely no purpose. The average ‘joe’, who they claim to protect, they abandoned in favor of the sound of their own voices. Anne Roberts, Ellen Woodsworth, Fred Bass and particularly Tim Louis, who favours wearing the picture of murderous thug Che Guevara on the back of his wheelchair, would do well to take one way tickets to Venezuela for tea with Hugo, instead of considering a return. And if David Cadman had any sense at all, he’d swiftly bolt from COPE to Vision. But I digress… Of particular note, was Vision’s decision to run their own Mayoral candidate and it is here that the calculus gets interesting. Clr. Raymond Louie (who told me he enjoys this column—clearly against his better judgment) is thinking about running for Mayor, as is, surprise, former NPA Parks Commissioner Al DeGenova, who left the AGM early to join his Parks Board colleagues in session. Neither of these men will do anything but serve to divide Vision. Neither has the cache to beat Mayor Sullivan’s vicious machine. The only potential candidate who could beat Sam Sullivan, handily, is a fellow named Gregor Robertson, the man at the Vision AGM who received a stunning ovation. Young, intelligent and affable, Mr. Robertson exudes hope and promise—something we haven’t seen in a very long time. “Sam’s approach on everything he’s touched since he became Mayor has resulted in confrontation and not one real accomplishment…it’s pretty shocking that the city has no leadership at such a critical time…Sam’s got it all wrong on everything from density to the Downtown Eastside..what happen to policing and treatment?” says Mr. Robertson. And while he makes great sense, he’s still thinking about running, apparently. But it sounds Mayoral, doesn’t it?

John Lee Hooker: Boom boom

Black eyed peas Where is the love

Your Weekend in Review Before it Happens

The blogger will be out of commish form the weekend...

so here's what you can take to the bank between now and Monday:

The Patriots and the Packers will win their games, setting up a classic showdown Feb. 3 in the Stupor Bowl between Tom Brady and Brett Favre, two of the games greatest quarterbacks ever.

Your mutual funds will be worth less than they were on Thursday.

More illegal immigrants, criminals and miscreants will be safely hidden amongst us, gathering income supplements of one kind or another and refusing to return to the hell hole from which they came.

More amazing pronouncements will be made by more governments about fabulous programs that will enrich all our lives. And, by the way, we and our grandchildren will pay for these initiatives, but we won't mind because we are Canadians, a genus often difficult to distinguish from sheep.

Kim Capri will move into the luxe new dog pound.

Sam Sullivan will claim ownership of yet another program that he has had absolutely nothing to do with, while simultaneously refusing to admit that he owns other programs for which he has registered private patents. As always, his staff will be blamed.

Gordon will still be wearing those glasses that declare, "I am a thirty-something Yaletown law student."

Province Column - January 18/08

Make public transit pleasant, safe and quick and we will pay for it

David Berner

The Province

Friday, January 18, 2008

BART, where are you now that we need you? Not Bart Simpson. He's on 15 channels, even at four in the morning. I mean San Francisco's Bay Area Rapid Transit System.

I was in the Bay area recently, and travelled from the San Francisco airport to the Oakland-Coliseum stop and back on separate days, a trip of about 50 minutes.

I also travelled from the Oakland-Coliseum stop to Powell Street, Market Street and Union Square and back on another day. That's a trip of about 25 minutes.

Has BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) reduced auto traffic on the Bay Bridge or roads in general? I would guess not.

We drove four times from the Oakland stop to and from my friend's house in the suburb of Clayton. Each trip took one hour on a packed freeway system.

Does that mean BART is a waste? Not at all. It's a great system. Millions of people use it every day. And if more lines are built, more people will use them.

On all occasions, I found the BART experience almost pleasurable.

Imagine, a pleasurable transit experience . . . cheap, efficient, reliable, easy to understand and negotiate, just like transit in Washington, D.C., London and Toronto, to name three.

Imagine big, bold readable signage that directs you to board the train you actually want.

Imagine ticket and turnstile systems that actually cut the freeloaders down to nil.

Imagine streetcars and buses that don't feel like the first stop on the road to Purgatory.

Compare that to your daily Metro Vancouver drudge.

If Premier Campbell wants to build more public transit, I say do it, bring it on! What's a billion here, a billion there between buddies?

The monumental premier is working so hard to belong to the W.A.C. Bennett class. He hungers to leave behind him steel-and-concrete memorials -- the Gordon This, the Campbell That, twinned bridges, convention centres, luge tracks.

Fine. Whatever pumps your cylinders. Build the damn things already, only this time, try to do it right.

Give us trains that are bigger than Tonka toys. Compared to subways almost anywhere else in the world, SkyTrain cars feel like a short step above the miniature railway.

Give us buses and more buses and then some more buses. And how about streetcars and light rail?

And give us security. We don't want drivers punched. We don't want to listen to garbage talk. We don't want women robbed and assaulted at station hubs.

More is good, but better is better. We want transit that is a reasonably pleasant experience.

The carbon issues, the global-warming themes are all very nice, but for most of us these are mute points.

We want to get from A to B relatively quickly and in one piece, ready for our workday or our evening at home.

Yes, we want more public transit. And yes, we'll even pay for it.

But, be warned: If it's the same old bummer, look out for my new Hummer.

david@davidberner.com

Tony Bennett - Cold Cold Heart