Due respect...

O.K. Sopranos Fans.

The Big Bump is tonight.

That is, if you live in the USA. For the rest of us, we'll have to wait until next year for one of the local scumbag networks to run the last season or hightail it to the video store or somehow get a pirate copy. Imagine that!

In da meantime...check out the comments from the actors as they prepare for the final episode.

Streisand/Mathis - I Have A Love/One Hand, One Heart

Try to sing along with this! I have it in my car and I am often attempting this impossibility. Thank your lucky stars you're not around at the time...

The Changing Face (& Ear & Nose) of Music

Much has been made about the closing of Sam, the Record Man, on Yonge Street.

As it should, as this is clearly a sign of the times and the signalling of a passing era. Beset by iPod, the net, YouTube, Myspace, iTunes, Facebook and, even more importantly, Wal-Mart's unbeatable purchasing and discount selling power, hardly a record store known to humankind can survive. When McCartney launches his latest CD at Starbucks, you know something is afoot.

(Completely aside, have you ever seen a music man less joyful? What is this fellow's problem? He if doesn't have life by the knackers, which of us does? If you watch the PBS documentary, "The Making of Duets: Tony Bennett & Guests," you will see a laughing, smiling, joyful Jim Taylor, Elton John, Michael Buble, Diana Krall et al, and this dour, serious, CORPORATE Paul McCartney. It is passing strange, my friends.)

But I believe there is something even deeper at play here than the onslaught on new technologies and the dominance of an overpowering marketer. Even specialty record shops - classical, jazz, Latin - are having trouble surviving.

I'll tell you why.

Last year I went into the now disappeared "Magic Flute" on West 4th Avenue. This is a store I tended to avoid because it was always, in my experience, way less than magical. Often rude and snooty and unhelpful and self-involved would be closer to the truth. But last year, I went in and, unable to find what I wanted, I asked the young lady to point me to Jascha Heifetz. If you Google Heifetz, you will see him referred to at once as "The Violinist of the Century."

Of course, the young lady had no idea who of what I was talking about. Is he a composer? And so on. Can you expect to run a classical music store with employees who have never heard of Heifetz?

Beyond all of those other factors (which are very much at play), I think the deeper reason for the end of the record store as we may have known it is an abiding ignorance and self-absorption. It is yet another reflection of our adolescent culture.

Goo-goo, ga-ga.

Charter Rights vs. Politic$

The Supreme Court of Canada has reversed an earlier decision and declared that collective bargaining rights are enshrined in the Charter of Rights and Freedoms.

But Gordon Campbell, who tore up agreements with hospital workers in 2002 - after swearing he'd never be the SOB to do such a thing - has since hired 5000 non-union sweepers and cleaners and cooks and bedpan emptiers.

What's a fellow to do?

Let us all watch closely now as the government and the unions are both being called upon to revert to what used to be known as "sweet reasonableness."

Leave us not hold our breath, lest we float to the ceiling and be asked to paint it while we're up there.

Blind Justice Poked in the Eye

Explosives, landmines, machine guns and a Nazi flag.

Those were just some of the fun toys found yesterday in a 21st floor apartment at Citygate.

The "suspect" has been released on $50,000 bail.

This is managing public safety?

INFOTAINMENT AT ITS WORST

Please explain to me why CNN spent the entire night on Paris Hilton.

Our interest in Ms. Hilton is less than zero.

Millions are starving, the ice is melting, lunatics abound, science is making astonishing new discoveries, music and art are being composed as we speak.

PH is news?

CNN is "the most trusted name in news?" Don't they have any respect for their own franchise?

Company - Donmar - Being Alive

You'll have to click on the youtube.com thingy to see and hear this - but it's worth it...one of sondhem's best.

Cleo Laine - Send in the Clowns

I don't know about this strange, kitchy, overstuffed hotel room setting room and dreadful clothes and ovdeeracting BUT...Cleo is one of the great jazz singers and this is a great Sondheim standard.

God, Gays & Guns

What constitutes "worthy" or "legitimate" debate in general elections?

It is (pick one) amazing? scary? laughable? disheartening? to see that Republicans and Democrats and that great arbitrator of All Things American, Wolfe Blitzer (zzzzzzz....), are all still caught in subjects most of us had long settled and abandoned.

God is your own business. Keep Him/Her/It of the hustings. If you've found Him/Her/It, be happy and be quiet.

Gay is your own business. Fred and Frank living next door to Alicia and Torvel is not the end of the human race. Start up the barbecue and be quiet.

Guns...now there's a worthy topic. But the Americans won't have a reasonable discussion and the politicians are terrified of the NRA, so they won't vote on any bill that might limit Ted Nugent's freedom to pack weapons of mass destruction in his Fargo. And Canadians - well, we have a 2 billion dollar mistake to figure out from our last attempt to make sense of guns.

Yet somehow, when the real issues are Health Care (In America, nobody has it; in Canada, we can't keep paying for it.) and Education and Productivity, the populace will once again be derailed by non-issues like God, gays, Abortion and whether or not Paris Hilton is or isn't in jail somewhere for something as we speak.

banks don't want tellers...they want walls that spit money...

Here is a simple fact of life that we should remember as often as possible:

BANKS HAVE MARBLE FLOORS AND VAULTED CEILINGS AND PRIME LOCATIONS.

Did you ever crouch into a little, crowded, decaying shack on a side street that called itself a bank in Canada? Well no, you didn't.

So when we learn that CIBC is facing a $600 Million class-action lawsuit by employees who have consistently been working overtime and not being paid for their efforts, we holler, "HALLELUJAH!" Or something to that effect.

This culture - banks and their lowly tellers - is described as place with "a system of passive enforcement that relies on people complaining."

Right.

Right. Sue the bastards, make them pay through their CEO's noses. Pirates and brigands in blue suits all. A pox on you...

"The Reality is Needles are not a Good Way to Use Drugs."

Who else do we know in possession of such practical wisdom?

Why only one person - the Nutty, Evil, Misguided, Sick, Disgusting Mayor.

Anyone who continues to discuss the paraphernalia or the methodology of addictions (Whiskey is harsher than gin! Transfats are worse than carbos!) has missed the bus entirely...hell, missed the highway.

There are people in this community so stupid (doctors, lawyers, mining executives) they are paying thousands of dollars to get this Terrible Man re-elected.

The Media is a Ghoul

Princes William and Harry have asked Channel 4 to not air a particularly gruesome and unnecessary foto of their late mother moments after the car crash that killed her.

But listen to the rationalization of these amoral creeps.

We "weighed the princes' concern against the legitimate public interest..."

'nuff said.

Always Follow the Money

Scooter Libby was sentenced to 30 months in jail and a $250,000 fine for lying about his role in CIA business, media manipulation, and clouding the real issues of the Iraq invasion. Mr. Libby was Dick Cheney's right hand boob.

Read the whole story, and then ask yourself, "What is the culpability of Cheney? Bush?"

And most importantly, "How much is Scooter being compensated for falling on their swords? How will he be taken care of when he emerges from prison?"

And, "Why didn't he tell all?"

FISHY NUPTIALS

Tory MP John Cummins is one of those rare admirable politicians.

Cummins has been fighting clearly, consistently and vociferously through Liberal and Conservative regimes for equality of fishing rights, real and effective coast guards and proper management of our Pacific waterways.

Once again, he has risen to the occasion, severely challenging his own government's Transport Minister Lawrence Cannon. Mr. Cannon has just announced the marriage of the Vancouver Port Authority, the Fraser River Port Authority, and the North Fraser Port Authority.

This merger serves no recognizable purpose.

It is, in fact, a further detriment to the possibility of good management of our ports, something that has already been eluding our governments for years. The Vancouver Ports are so well managed we are lucky we get fresh peas, new Toyotas or sports clothes with any regularity.

The Port is the first and only reason we are all here to begin with, not that most Vancouverites notice. As we have increasingly become a service economy, fueled by condos and chai lattes, as more and more alleged "citizens" are text messaging their way through the gridlock, as you have become less and less important or even noticeable if you are not a direct and immediate part of my movie, our connection to basics has evaporated.

Mr. Cummins' cries are a small and welcome voice in the wind.

Jefferson Airplane - White Rabbit (Woodstock 1969)

Gracie Slickk and the Airplane played the old Russisn Hall on 4th Avenue one weekend about 40 years ago. We payed a dollar for the whole weekend of dance and stuff. They announced they had a new song...

The Whoring Vancouver Agreement

The Vancouver Agreement is a little known collaboration of Federal, Provincial and Municipal Governments. It's all about "partnerships" and "integrated approaches." Or so it claims.

Mostly what it is about is middle management mandarins of the the status quo meeting and interfacing and discussing and eating lunch and congratulating themselves on their latest feat of social engineering. Little jujubes like "harm reduction."

What it is really about is spending tax dollars in ways that rarely achieve anything, other than making the partners at the table feel real good about themselves.

Most people, if they knew the slightest thing about the Vancouver Agreement, would agree on one thing: Shut this scam down.

Today we were furnished with another great example of the Agreement's good work.

"A final report by the Living in Community Coalition, funded by $200,000 from the Vancouver Agreement, is recommending more safe places where sex workers can ply their trade, recover from addiction or leave the streets altogether." So reports the morning paper.

Let's not even get into all the arguments about whether such ideas are worthy or workable. Let's not ask how or where these addiction recoveries might take place.

Let's just focus on this one nasty thought: $200,000 was spent on middle class, middle management mandarins to discuss a problem - prostitution - that has been around for a few days, give or take.

That's $200,000 that could have been spent directly on helping and encouraging a few lost souls to escape the well-documents cycles of prostitution. We did that years ago at an institution I ran by just doing it. No discussion, no funding, no integrated approach.

But why would we do that, when we can spend more money and waste more time on "research" and "reports?"

Corruption and inaction comes in many disguises.

Real Good in the Real World. It's rare enough, and it must be Witnessed.

Technology being what it is - imperfect - my attempt to post an important and wonderful video from YouTube has either failed or been delayed. Who can tell?

HOWEVER...In March, I was delighted to present Mark Leiren-Young's one man show, "Shylock," in Victoria for 2 nights as a fundraiser for "Positively Africa." This is a wonderful program fighting HIV-AIDS in villages in Africa. The program is run by Peggy Frank and Peter Bardon, who produced the "Shylock" show which raised over $7,000 for their work.

Here are Peggy and Peter in Lesotho. Please watch; this is a beautiful piece and they are beautiful friends.

“I personally don’t know anybody who doesn’t have two in his truck.”

That salient bit of Americana comes from rock star Ted Nugent.

Mr. Nugent is referring of course to "black rifles," a particularly deadly strain of automatic assault weapon made specifically for close combat. And perfect for classroom mayhem.

What is so telling in the NY Times full story is that no matter what legislators may try to do to curb the sale of such arsenal, Americans always find a way to keep buying and arming.

If you Google "AR-15," you get 1,590,000 entries in 0.21 seconds, which shows there is some interest in this madness.

Read the article and lock the door.

Enough Already...

You know what?

It's a beautiful day.

I've read the entire paper and .... zzzzzz....

Awards to cheesy, third-rate people, analyses of miscreants, chronicalling of the end of a dreadful presidency, gossip, and the story of the brilliant mastermind criminals who end up enjoying their ill-begotten gains in Winnipeg! Hahahaha...

I'm going for a walk.

Later, I'll meet with friends.

Then Sweetheart and I will have dinner. Tomorrow a bike ride, a movie and more dinner.

Life's a beach.

Guest Blogger eats Out and Finds Sushi Surprise!

Those of you who, like me, eat alone in restaurants will understand this story. Those who have company when they go to restaurants, will, perhaps, gain understanding.

I went to a sushi restaurant today, newspaper in hand, planning on a bit of sashimi, a beer and a relaxing read of the paper.

I sat at the very end of the bar, next to the wall, taking as little space as possible, as those who dine alone do. We leave the tables for couples and families because we realize that we are like the wounded gazelle at the waterhole. We dare not take too much space.

After settling, I was approached by a charming server who suggested I might want to move to a table, since meals were served over the bar, near to my location. I never, ever, disrespect servers, so I pointed out to her that since there was a stool there, I assumed I could sit there. I added that since I was alone, I didn't want to take a table. She charmingly agreed.

I hadn't made it to page 3 before her boss, a brick-faced, middle-aged Japanese women asked me if I was ready to order. I replied that I would sip my beer and read for a few minutes and then order. She returned every two minutes to bark her question, before I got to page five.

Feeling that I was in the way, I ordered. While waiting, the sushi dishes began being passed over my head to servers. When I first selected my corner stool, the dishes were passed two stools away. Now the plates were skimming my skull. Clearly some kind of statement.

Brickface returned and suggested that I might be more comfortable on the patio. Compared to having herring eggs dropped in my curly hair, it sounded like a good idea.

I went out to the patio. The charming server carried my plate. I resumed reading my paper when the husband of Brickface came to my table. Mr. Brickface informed me that I could not sit on the patio since I had ordered beer with my food ( my beer was untouched inside). They asked me to move again. I moved to a small table inside. They brought my now-limp sashimi and my warm beer. By now I was so nervous, I opened the paper and knocked over the beer. Brickface hissed and wiped the table. Nervous and confused, I left my meal and went home. I tipped Brickface. Hey, I'm a Catholic. We search for guilt.

So here is my message to restaurants. The lonely people are loyal customers. We tip better. We bring friends to places where we have been treated well.

While I was bumped from table to table I saw couples blabbering for an hour, long after they had eaten.

If I had a restaurant I would have a sign that said " You will never eat alone here, you will eat with friends".

This is for all the lonely people, as the song says.

Le Boulivardier

( although the boulevards aren't as friendly anymore) Homage to Springsteen.)