Saturday, January 31, 2009

John Allemang's Poetic Justice

A CBC hockey commentator hasdecried the "pansification" of the sportby anti-fighting campaigners. - news report

Us hockey fans just can't abide
The way the game's been pansified:
The whole excuse for Hockey Night
Lies in the hope we'll see a fight
Where heterosexual heavyweights
Prove real men can brawl on skates.
The thrill for us red-blooded males
Is when some goon who's tough as nails
Reveals the thing he really loves
Is daring guys to drop their gloves,
Which shows that masculinity
Still has a place on CBC.
But now some pansies, fags and gays
Want hockey's men to change their ways,
And turn the coiled enforcer's fist
Into a limp, unmanly wrist,
As if true fans would waste their breath
On games without the risk of death.
So fight back, jocks who fit the norm,
Against the pantywaisted swarm
Who'll strip away our simple joys
And make us all their nancy boys.
Assert your homophobic rights
With hockey's proud, hormonal fights.

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