Musing

Yesterday over breakfast, between raising the minimum wage in BC (It's the lowest in Canada.) and approving of our waiter's pension plans, we were conjecturing about the future of Gordon Campbell, the BC Liberals and the political landscape in general.

Our take went something like this.

Campbell will not run again.

He will want to quit "on top."

Kevin Falcon is chomping so hard at the bit to be the next leader that his teeth are being ground to dust as we speak.

No one will let that happen in this lifetime.

Rich Coleman would also like The Cape.

He won't get it either.

Carole Taylor can take the job any time she wants, and if she runs, she will win handily.

So what do you think happens?

This morning, Gary Mason muses over the same possibilities in his Globe column, and Carole Taylor announces publicly that the HST is bad economics and worse politics.

Mason figures that Campbell will not go gently into that good night.

Perhaps, fueled by morning coffee and OJ, we were being optimistic.

The next election is unbearably three years away.

Oy...

However, a lot of things can happen in three years.

Let's hope that nine of them are scandals that put an end to the current reign of Old Granite Heart.


By the way, on the subject of the HST, I am so completely fed up to the teeth with the Captains of Industry telling us that this usury is good for us.

These so-called leaders, these corporate ganiffs ares so unbelievably out of touch with ordinary struggling citizens.

If you're driving a couple of beemers and lunching at West and private jetting off to Madrid for a few rounds of golf, you can't possibly understand for a moment people trying to but their first house or seniors trying to pay bills or young parents trying to pay for school supplies.

Retrogressive Politics

Whatever your convictions about the subject of abortion, Stephen Harper's refusal to fund abortions in our international aid programs is simply stupid.

Canada is refusing to fund abortion services as part of a G8 initiative to improve the health of mothers in poor countries.

This shows a clear lack of good street smarts.

The question of whether family planning would be part of the G8 maternal-health initiative is deemed important by most experts because many of the estimated 500,000 childbirth deaths in developing countries each year are caused by complications from women becoming pregnant too young and too often in quick succession.

Saul Alinsky, the legendary American community organizer (and author of the great, great, great biography of labour leader, John L. Lewis) loved to tell the following story.

Paul sends his emissaries and disciples out across the Mediterranean to sign up non-believers to the new religion of Christianity.

Months later, a weary preacher returns with his report.

"Oh Paul, the Phoenicians are really liking our message. They can see the divinity of Our Lord and so forth, but there is one problem."

"Yes?"

"They are really balking at the circumcision."

"Fine! To hell with the circumcision! Sing 'em up anyway, Good Soldier!!"

The inclusion of safe abortion services, where they are legal, is also promoted by many experts, because so many deaths are caused by complications from botched abortions.

Choking on the fine print is exactly why nothing ever gets accomplished in the real world once politicians get in the mix.

World Vision Canada has the appropriate take on this nonsense.

The political debate about whether Ottawa should fund safe abortion services overseas is a distraction, and should not be allowed to derail a new Canadian-led campaign to save the lives of new mothers and children the world's poorest countries.

They are right.

Drop the posturing, fund the programs and move on.

Eighth or Ninth Wonder

By the way, YouTube is five years old, yesterday, I think.

Five years.

By now, we take it for granted and assume it's been around since just after George I.

How amazing it all is.

I search "Pablo Casals."

Without even asking for it, up comes the Bach Suites, which is what I wanted in the first place.

Not only that, but rare film footage.

I copy the code onto this blog.

You click and watch and hear.

It's amazing, isn't it?

Turn Up the Volume - A Rare Beauty

MInding Our Mint

Sheila Fraser is one of my few national heroes.

She is the Auditor-General and every year, Ms. Fraser delights us all with her revelations about how various government departments and agencies waste our tax dollars.

She is a one-woman posse and Robin Hood, exposing rot at every available turn.

This morning we learn that there are even some places, Fraser may not go.

The Board of Internal Economy manages the expenses of the House of Commons. A similar committee runs the Senate. Both committees meet in secret.

As John Ibbitson reports, ten months ago, Auditor General Sheila Fraser formally asked these two committees for permission to audit Parliament's expenses, including the expenses of MPs and senators. She still hasn't received a reply.

Silence equals no.

The board is exempt from external audits and Freedom of Information requests.

In other words, the way that Larry Campbell and his Red Chamber cohorts and all the MP's in the House of Commons spend our tax dollars for their personal convenience is not open to public examination.

Cell phones and lunches, anyone?

We are talking here about a combined budget of over HALF A BILLION DOLLARS.

The next time you think about voting, go to a candidates' meeting and ask them when they're going to change this little loophole.

And again, thank our lucky stars for Sheila Fraser.

Still Dangerous After All These Years

Photos: Spanish matador Jose Tomas seriously gored in Mexican bullfight

Tomas, one of the top Spanish matadors, is in serious condition after being gored during this bullfight in Mexico

When I was 19 years old, I was traveling in Spain.

In Valencia, we went to the big corrida to see an afternoon of bull fighting.

We saw the most famous and most popular fighter of that era, an 18-year boy-genius of the ring known as "El Cordobez."

That afternoon, he was twice awarded two ears and a tail for his startling, masterful triumphs over two terrifying fire-snorting blue-black monsters.

We made the hideous mistake off asking people around us how the young man compared with the legendary Manolete.

They glared at us as if we were mad.

"Manolete es UNO!" one outraged patron declared.

Bull fighting is a strange anachronism in the modern world.

No doubt many people are deeply offended by what can be seen as a barbaric and cruel ritual.

It is hard to argue with that position.

On the other hand, if you spend a day watching great fighters and great bulls, you cannot deny the fear and horror and excitement and adrenalin attack that comes along with the coca-cola or beer.

Today I might not return to the ring to see another six fights, but I cannot forget what I saw so many years ago.

Nothing to be Said - Just Listen

Quo Vadis?

Two separate groups are squaring off in Las Vegas, Nevada to see who can built and open the first and best Organized Crime Museum.

One group claims government backers and money.

The other is supported by a famous mafioso's daughter.

This comedy lays bare a serious problem in our culture. (I include Canada's pop mentality with America's.)

To so many people - that is, people with no brains or education or thought processes, but apparently enough disposable income to make fools of themselves - much of life is a video game.

Or a movie or a TV show.

There is no question that crime movies and crime novels and crime TV series are a staple of our "culture."

Many of them are well done, that is, well-written and well-acted and well-produced. The costumes are rich, the automobiles are sensational, the houses and apartments are gorgeous, and, most importantly, the killings are spectacular.

The two "Godfather" movies are a prime example of great story telling.

"Bugsy" is silly fun. "Law and Order" is addictive. So was "NYPD Blue."

BUT...

What relationship to reality is any of the above supposed to have?

IT'S A MOVIE, YOU NITWITS.

It's called 'entertainment.'

Now, the truly stupid who walk among us will pay cash to go to "museums" to see the glamour and excitement of True Crime before their very own believing eyes?

True crime, boys and girls, is ugly, cheesy, smelly, not witty or clever. It is adrenalin popping violent and scary and dehumanizing.

OK.

I get it.

You are a bored, boring schmuck from Pleasantville and, between your free breakfasts, you want to live vicariously for an hour with the romantic colorful characters of American crime lore.

OK.

Go ahead.

Knock yourself out.

Oscar, Shmoscar

"Just what do you think you are doing, Dave?

Dave?

Stop. Stop. Stop, Dave.

I honestly think you should sit down and take a stress pill and think things over.

Dave?"

All of the above and so much more came from the voice of Douglas Rain, great Canadian actor born in Winnipeg.

The character he was playing was the computer HAL 9000.

Kubrick's monumental brilliant 1968 film wasn't even in the running for Best Picture at the '69 Oscars. That "honour" went to Lionel Bart's musical "Oliver!"

I love "Oliver!"

I've played the part of Fagin twice on stage.

But, get serious.

"2001" is one of the great movie achievements of all time.

A mind-blower on every level and watchable year after year.

Nutty, yes.

Strange, yes?

Lacking sex and car chases and magnums, yes.

But a classic.

Below is one of my favorite movie sequences of all time - as Dave begins to shut down the spooky HAL 9000...

Great Film Moments

When "reasonable suspicion" = skin color

Gov. Jan Brewer of Arizona signed the nation’s toughest bill on illegal immigration into law on Friday. Its aim is to identify, prosecute and deport illegal immigrants.

That might be fine, except that, as one Hispanic said, "The police will not be targeting Canadians."

This is about Mexicans.

And the new law gives local police the power, based basically on their gut instincts, to stop anyone and ask for their papers.

The Governor has insisted that there will be no racial profiling.

Check.

What these folks have done is given President Obama, who will be fighting this legislation tooth and nail, every Hispanic vote in the country. If he missed a few, first time out, he needn't worry now. This is a very big very early Christmas present from the Republicans.

I will not be rushing down to Scottsdale soon.

If I want to go back in time, I will read a history book.

Am I Seeing Straight?

Many people, especially seniors, cannot afford glasses or visits to the optometrist.

That's why you have been able to buy ready-mades off the revolving shelf at your local drug store for years now.

Nevertheless, there is still something mighty peculiar when that arbiter of all things healthy, Kevin Falcon, Not M.D., decides to open up the glasses and contact lenses market to online shoppers and shippers.

Does this not impress as just the good minister's weekly announcement about deregulation and private plans and free enterprise principles in the wonderful world of health care?

It's strange.

This latest maneuver may or may not be a good one, but Falcon is so consistent that I have become unable to swallow anything he chooses to out dish.

Get Serious

I knew it. I knew it. I knew it.

And I predicted it.

Sure enough, right as rain, the Globe has a front page story and two full pages of coverage on how MOST Sikhs are really wonderful, peaceful law-abiding citizens and it's only "that handful" of meanies and scallywags who are causing all the trouble.

This is apparently necessary because of a) the on-going death threats to Ujjal Dosanjh and b) the lovely fights that broke out recently in two Ontario Sikh temples.

Of course, police had to be called.

In the little dust up at the Brampton house of worship, machetes. hammers and axes made sudden miraculous appearances.

That's machetes, hammers and axes.

Of course.

We always go to temple armed to the teeth.

I've got an idea.

Instead of rushing to assure us that everything's alright, everything's fine and "the majority are shamed by the brutality of the few," how about that majority of peace-loving Canadian citizens get their hysterical "few" to stop with the death threats and harvesting and woodworking tools taken to the place of quiet contemplation and meditation?

How about the majority make it very clear to "the few" that their heinous behaviour is both unwelcome and illegal and that it will not be tolerated?

Breakthrough

The scientific world is all agog because many new life forms and species have been found in Borneo, including a lungless frog.

Big deal.

Those wildlife researchers should come to Canada.

We have two heartless premiers.

The one in B.C. doesn't care about children or old people and the one in Ontario has also lost his balls.

Gene Lees

What the video post below doesn't say it that the lyrics for "Waltz for Debby" were written by Canadian Jazz Great, Gene Lees, who has passed away at the age of 82.

"In her own small world,
Captivated by dolls and clowns and a Prince and big purple bear,
Lives my favorite girl,
Unaware of the worried frowns that her weary parents all wear..."

I have a particular fondness for this song.

Whenever I am walking or driving to a speaking engagement or performance gig of any kind, part of my warm-up routine includes singing this piece. When I do, always think of my beautiful daughter, Catherine.

Tony Bennett recorded the tune with Bill Evans and it is way beyond great.

I had the great pleasure of interviewing Gene on the radio a few thousand years ago and he was, in addition to being a fount of jazz lore & info, a lovely and charming guy.

When he wasn't being the editor of "Down Beat," or writing books about jazz greats, or a thousand and one other tasks, Lees wrote the English lyrics for a few little pieces, like Jobim's "Quiet Nights of Quiet Stars."

We've lost a good one.

Genius

Cowardly Captain

While Gordon Campbell, our Monumental Premier, likes to think of himself as the Treaty and Land Claims Premier, Ontario's Dalton McGuinty has fashioned himself as the "Education Premier."

Not so fast there, Bunky.

Now, he may be known henceforth as Mr. Back Down or the Big Switch.

Or just plain Wishy Washy Guy.

Yesterday, we spoke in this space about plans for more sex education in Ontario schools.

In fact, sex ed has been around for a donkey's age and the new plan was just a re-working of things and it had been trotted out and dissected for two years before its current version.

But, as we discussed yesterday, fundamentalist religionistas hit the bricks swinging.

How dare you talk to our kids about these dirty birds and bees? Leave it to us parents to screw them up.

And today...in response to this minority of cave dwellers and wagon pullers, the good Premier has reversed his position and pulled the program.

What a dork.

Canada is a puritanical country.

Not as much as God, Guns & Glory America, of course. Nobody on earth is as uptight about nature as yer Yanquis.

But we are holding our own, so to speak.
We are so bad at making babies that we have to import entire civilizations to give the census takers something to do.

Let's hear it for Dalton McGuinty, a man so afraid of his own shadow that he overrides his own education ministry and thousands of people who have slaved over a process and a program that he knows damn little about because a TV evangelist goes postal on him.

Man up, Sugar Plum.

Being intimidated by a handful of wacko "believers" is not leadership.

Terrorism at Home and Abroad

The Globe & Mail is reporting on their web edition that Ujjal Dosanjh is the target of assassination threats on a Facebook site.

“It'd be much more appropriate to pierce him with bullets, not compassion,” the posting said.

The RCMP are investigating.

Please read the story here.

Sick. Sickening.

And in New York, the writers and producers of the racy TV cartoon show, South Park, have also received death threats over a recent Muhammad satire.

Madness abounds.

In France, a woman driver wearing an Islamic face veil has been fined by French police for not having a clear field of vision.

Good luck with that.

It's the Money, Stupid

The Premier likes to think he is the best friend in the whole wide world of aboriginals.

When he's not appearing somewhere or other for a photo op waring a turban, he's wearing a headdress or an eagle feather.

In his delusion, he is the "land claims settlement Premier."

How pleasant it must be for him to wake up this morning and learn that BC Natives have joined the Van Der Zalm war against the HST.

Of course, if I were Chief Stewart Phillip, head of the Union of B.C. Indian Chiefs and I wrote a letter to Colin Hansen only to brushed off with a short reply and a refusal to meet, I'd be on the warpath too.

Do Hansen and Campbell not communicate?

Or does Campbell only see Indian Chiefs when it's convenient for him?

“We are no longer the flavour of the month, the Premier has moved on to further grandiose projects, like the billions of dollars for the Olympics or the Site C dam,” Mr. Phillip said.

Meanwhile Big Biz is busily defending the HST.

One of their brighter spokespersons said, "This petition isn't about the HST. It seems to be about dissatisfaction with the government."

Hahahahaha.

WRONG AGAIN, BLACKBERRY BREATH.

It is entirely about the $$$$$$.

It is about families taxed to the max.

It is about haircuts and bicycles costing more.

Of course, for Mr. Howe Street, a few kopeks here or there will hardly cut into the morning latte. I'm alright, Jack. What me, worry?

That's the trouble with the tailored suit crowd - just a little out of touch.

Zalm's anti-HST campaign may or may not pull of the come-from-behind.

But it certainly clears the nostrils and draws the lines between the haves and have nots, a dichotomy carved out so cleanly by this Premier over recent years.

Marching Backwards, Praise the Lord

Ignorance is also power.

Perverse power.

The Ontario government wants more sex ed in public classrooms.

But wait.

Christians and Muslims strenuously object.

Why should children or adolescents have any knowledge or awareness of bodily functions, contraception, abortion, homosexuality, masturbation, gender differences and issues or any of the other myriad mysteries that are part of the puzzle called sex?

No.

Better they should wear tents and be treated like livestock.

Better they should be preached to about abstinence.

Understand and information are dangerous.

That's why we must leave all this to those ignoramuses we laughingly call parents.

In a perfect world, it would be lovely to think that parents in their wisdom would share and dispense such knowledge with their virgin off-spring.

But they don't.

The fact is they don't.

Proof of the pudding?

The Netherlands, where sex ed has been compulsory in all secondary schools for an ice age, has among the lowest teenage pregnancy rates in the world.

No.

Keep 'em in the dark.

Cover them head to foot in dark shrouds.

That'll really help things along.