Fun Exchange

Jeff Taylor said...

David, if you want to see the real reason our society is in so much trouble, please take a moment to read this blog written by a young woman whom recently came out from behind the riot's shadows. I couldn't believe what I was reading !

http://camillecacnioapology.wordpress.com/2011/06/19/dear-vancouver-i-am-sorry/#comment-436

June 20, 2011 12:13 PM

David Berner said...

Dear Jeff Taylor,

I have read with interest the blog post you quoted above and I have watched the video of her running out of the store with STOLEN GOODS, and I must say that I don't buy one word of it.

There is something essentially wrong with this young woman's character.

After her apology, she might try paying for the window and the STOLEN GOODS and cleaning up the city streets every night for a month or two.

She is like so many people sitting on the bus next to us.

She wears the easy veneer of civility, while not far below the surface she is a savage.

The worst thing about global warming is the loss of ice flows.

Great Comment Line

"It will happen again if Vancouver's idiot mayor continues to live in his own personal bike lane chicken coop dream world."

Hahahahaha...

Bravo!

THE BIG ENGINE

GREASE

We are an adolescent culture.

It is commonplace to see a 60 year old woman in a classically cut business suit and heels, her briefcase on the floor next to her, having a cafe or a small glass of white wine at 10 in the morning in a bar in Italy.

Here men and women schlepp about in public in fleece warm-up pants with rude messages emblazoned on their bums.

You could say we are laid back.

Or maybe we are just klutzes.

We certainly are careless and childish in our drinking habits and behaviours.

I have visited Venice, Italy 18 or 19 times since 1995, each stay for two weeks to a month. I have been out late many times. In all those visits, I have seen two men drunk and neither was a threat to anyone.

I have never heard hollering - except, of course, when I made the mistake of walking past the soccer stadium one afternoon, when VANCOUVER almost broke out.

Today's headlines are a pathetic joke.

SIGNS OF HEALING

To quote McEnroe, "You cannot be serious."

It is nice that a handful of decent citizens have shown up with their brooms and masking tape. They are good folk and we thank them.

But this Neanderthal madness cannot be dismissed that easily.

POLICE CHIEF PROMISES AN INTERNAL REVIEW

How about a competence test?

No one faults the stand-up performance of the officers who were put in harm's way the other night by the complete lack of foresight on the part of their superiors.

Whatever numbers of police had been deployed at the outset is half what the situation deserved. whatever barriers and corridors had been created in advance are a third of what was reasonably called for.

This was SOOOOOOOO PREDICTABLE.

We are a blue-jean wearing, stomping, goof-ball adolescent culture.

There is nothing even mildly amusing about how rude and crude we are.

What was learned from '94?

Nothing.

MAYOR SAYS BLAH, BLAH, BLAH

Go ahead. Invite 100,000 valueless children to congregate downtown. Why would anything untoward occur?

The man one commenter calls Mayor Moonbeam lives in a dopey dream.

And so do so many fellow Canadians.

There are no mortar shells whistling overhead.

Or bombs exploding on buses.

Or interrogation cells. Or extermination camps.

We are blessed by this peaceful beautiful country.

And cursed by its bounty.

We live in Fantasy Land.

Nothing bad can happen here. Until it does.

People are good. They always behave well. We are nice.

Excuse me while I wretch.

"This isn't the real Vancouver," rings the chorus of the permanently deluded.

OK.

You're right.

None of this happened.

We are nice.

We will investigate this rare moment of NOT NICENESS and chronicle it and bag it and put it on the shelf.

That was a two per cent decaf WITH the cinnamon sprinkles! GOD!

DEEP PURPLE DISGUST

Cutesy-Boy Puppet Mayor posed against a backdrop of burning police cars tells us with a straight face once again that "We are a World Class City."

You cannot write satire this rich.

These pointless, gormless, brainless thugs with no identity and no purpose feel ENTITLED to destroy public and private property.

There are riots these days in Guangzhou province in China and in Athens, Greece and in half the capitol cities of the Middle East. But these disturbances are about work and food and human rights and democracy. They are understandable.

We smash bank windows over a hockey game?

I cannot accept that the police had been properly organized and dispersed in the first place. If they had, not a tenth of the madness that ensued could have happened.

We have proven ourselves to be goofs and fools and most of us are deeply shamed.

Do these cave dwellers have families? Brains? Values?

Do we?

THE LESSON

BRAVO!

It is a rare night indeed when I am in tears at the end of a concert performance.

But that is exactly what happened on Saturday night before a packed and deliriously appreciative house at the Orpheum.

The VSO and James Ehnes, who have collaborated on a number of recording projects over the years, absolutely nailed the Tchaikovsky Violin Concerto.

This is a famous and popular piece.

But it is notoriously difficult to play, both for the orchestra and for the soloist. The rhythms and tempi change abruptly, the moods shift and slide and there are often more notes per square inch than any mere mortal should be able to produce.

Ehnes, playing no less than a Strad, was lyrical and dynamic and full of a thousand colours.

And Maestro Bramwell Tovey was possessed.

It didn't hurt that Ehnes quietly came back to the stage and blessed us with an exquisite little Bach sonata for an encore. Wow!

A ton of standing, shouting Bravos for all concerned.

The video above features Mr. Ehnes talking about and playing sections of the Tchaikovsky.

SLEEPERS

Dirk and the Two Jasons were sensational.

The richly deserve the NBA championship they stole from Miami last night.

But tell me.

Have you ever seen a professional sports team choke and wimp out as badly as the Heat did in the last few games.

LeBron James is supposed to be the best there is.

He didn't even show up.

Just sort of wandered around the parquet like a guy looking for a hot dog and a beer.

Maybe the Heat can be fined for Failure to Appear.

Maybe multi-millionaire athletes should try a little harder.

Meanwhile, never thought I'd cheer on a Dallas team in any sport, but the Mavs were absolutely great in every department.

SKOOL DAZE, PART 987,231

The Sun has a full page report on Education this morning.

Here's the gripping headline:

December-born children at a disadvantage

Study shows youngest kids are 12% less likely than older peers to graduate on time

Why not go right back to reading bumps on heads or isolating lefties?

A much more enlightening, but not very politically correct, article about Education can be found in this month's Atlantic magazine.

This excellent piece by Joel Klein, the prosecutor who took on the software giant Microsoft, tells a simple but chilling story about New York Schools. The exact conclusions could have been reached if he had studied BC schools:

Teachers, not parents or income class, are the single biggest determinant in how a child does in school.

But, thanks to controlling teachers unions (Here it is the BCTF.) teachers can not be graded, assessed or held in any way accountable for their performance.

There are almost no politicians on earth who are prepared to take on these unions and bring some measured quality to the classroom.

OH BOY

Franklin the Turtle is a boy.

Shame on him.

He, and all the other dominating sexist boy animal characters in children's books, are warping the minds and hearts of little girls everywhere.

These are the conclusions drawn in a 227-page study led by sociologist Janice McCabe of Florida State University.

Poor Janice.

Poor family and friends of Janice.
Just another excellent argument for more children staying out of University and going into auto mechanics and plumbing - regardless of their gender.

This is what is funded?

This is scholarship?

The Future of Entertainment

YES YES YES

To quote, Molly Bloom from Joyce's Ulysses, "Yes, I said, yes, I will, yes."

Of course, in that instance, the lady was getting fucked.

Oh, but then, so are we.

So, here is the HST referendum dumdum question that, depending on rotating postal strikes, will soon arrive at your door:

"ARE YOU IN FAVOUR OF EXTINGUISHING THE HST AND REINSTATING THE PST IN CONJUNCTION WITH THE GST?"

If you answer "Yes," that means you want the HST drop-kicked through the goal posts of life.

The question is confusing and a double-negative and a bit of a sham at heart because who knows what the administration will actually do with the results. Has anyone said this exercise is binding, other than around our hearts?

Nevertheless, harken not the business and government interests that have been bombarding you with lies and bolder lies. I kept waiting for leaflets to flutter down from the skies overhead.

The HST is one way or another more tax money for more bloated government.

The only reasonable answer is YES, A THOUSAND TIMES YES.

DITTO

Yesterday, I wrote in this space about the fine job all local politicians are doing using and abusing "ethnic" communities for cheap and ready votes.

I am not alone in my sentiments.

Read Vaughn Palmer in today's Sun for more of the same.

The sub-headline gives a hint of what's to follow:

Hundreds of Surrey residents joined both NDP and Liberals, and that abuse needs to stop

TRAVEL TIPS

Get elected.

In 2007 and 2008, David Cadman, Vancouver City councillor, spent $59,000 of taxpayer, public money for trips to Poland, Korea, New York, Amsterdam, Bonn, Barcelona, Honolulu, Geneva, Bali, Kyoto and Auckland.

That's The Cad, featured in the photo.

He's smiling because he's just had a wonderful meal at your expense and he's going to photograph exotic animals after the conference.

I want that money back.

And all the other money that all the other elected vampires spent in business class airplane seats and first class hotel rooms around the world.

Can we launch a class action suit against these honorable men and women?

For theft and fraud and misuse of public trust.

TEA FOR TWO

"South Asians" apparently hold all keys to democracy in British Columbia.

South Asians is codeword for Indian and Pakistani, as far as I can understand this term when used in the context of voting and elections.

Three years ago in a public forum, I dared to question the decency and usefulness of busing in hundreds of elderly new immigrants who didn't speak English or French, who had no idea of local history and who knew nothing of the candidates on the ballots. These people cast votes. Their votes were decisive in election results.

The words were barely out of my mouth when Kerry Jang, then a Vision slate candidate for Vancouver City Council, and now a Vision slate Vancouver City Councillor, leapt to his feet enraged.

Of course, he accused me of racism, among other crimes.

After the public debate, Jang stood in front of me and glared.

When I asked him what he wanted, he hissed, "I know you!"

I assured him he knew nothing about me, and ended with the ever graceful, "F--- off!"

Interesting, therefore, to read the morning headline:

B.C. Liberal, NDP leadership races saw same people sign up for both parties

followed by this:

"Several hundred Surrey residents held dual memberships in the B.C. Liberal Party and provincial NDP when both parties were holding their leadership campaigns earlier this year.

It was well known that organizers for candidates in both parties were aggressively signing up South Asians in Surrey during the leadership contests..."

So, your Mr. Gill and my Mr. Gill loves both political parties equally.

Isn't that nice?

Isn't that exactly what we want all Canadians to understand about political process?

Isn't that what we teach in civics class?

Oh, I forgot.

We don't teach civics class.

Pity.

Only in Canada, you say?

CHILD PROTECTION

UNCIVIL

An editorial in the Vancouver Sun this morning contains disturbing information.

In the wonderful world of hate crimes, nobody is more targeted more often than Jews.

There are only about 300,000 of us in all of Canada.

Less than one per cent of the Canadian population.

Were the 25th ethnic group out of 25.

Yet we suffer more hate crimes than blacks, gays, Muslims and presumably alley cats put together.

I have a neighbor who is a wonderful old man. Much accomplished and very creative.

I've always been very fond of him.

Until about a year and a half ago when he told me about what "the Hebrews are doing to the Palestinians."

The Hebrews.

It wasn't since I was a kid in the north end of Winnipeg that I heard the phrase, "dirty Hebe."

I told my neighbor that I was shocked by his comment and that this expression showed an appalling ignorance of many things, including history, ancient and modern.

I can barely say Hello these days as I pass him in the street.

And the numbers of hate crimes against all peoples and groups is on the rise.

ALMOST JUSTICE

We really have our eyes on the prize here in BC.

We spend millions of fabulous new court rooms. Good.

But the, oops, we cut the budget for police to supervise the trails that are supposed to take place in these fancy new court rooms. Not so good.

34 sheriff positions have been cut.

Result?

No trials can be held.

Back logs.

Bad guys waiting trial.

Justice delayed is justice denied.

But why spend money on justice when you can build a new stadium roof or a big dam that nobody wants?

LITTLE MOUNTAIN IS A SCANDAL

I've got an idea.

Let's displace 220 families from inexpensive social housing they've enjoyed for many years.

We can sell the property to someone in Asia (a favorite Vancouver past time), have them screw up and not get along with the city and choke on some other grandiose downtown projects and then have the property city empty for years on end afterwards.

Won't that be fun?

And helpful?

And humane and considerate of poor people.

Jeff Lee has chronicled exactly this little local nightmare in this morning's piece of the Little Mountain debacle, which could easily outrun the Olympic Village for incompetence and idiocy except that it's not as sexy and chichi.

This project is so off the map that,three years after almost everyone was booted, plans for the site have yet to be drawn.

Nice planning.

Now, this story will not hold the public's attention because it is not about waterfront condos.

And that's a tragedy.

SO FINE...